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Friday, April 18th, 2008
10:00 am - I am having a rough morning.
After a 13 hour work day and a few big mistakes later, all I can handle is that I am slowing coming to terms with the fact that olives do not completely suck.

And also, what the fuck?


You know you're a little bit disturbed when a person is brought up in conversation, you immediately ask if there facebook is public or private.

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Tuesday, April 8th, 2008
2:18 pm
I have  5 vacation days that I have to use by July 1st.

tell me where. tell me when.

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8:24 am - I miss the April I used to know.
anyone got the goods on AFA yet? I know bout my team, but im interested in so many other kids. I lost iel access when i graduated- I hear its posted somewhere. 

Congrats to babies I've heard about, and those I've yet to hear about!

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Wednesday, March 26th, 2008
1:32 pm
 When people's resume lists that they were runner up homecoming king senior year, I don't know if I'm supposed to hate them or love them.

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Wednesday, December 12th, 2007
11:49 am
 I'm so bored that I just played with tape for a 30 minutes. Then came here to tell you all about it.

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Monday, December 3rd, 2007
1:17 pm - you can put your double next to my queen

Tomorrow I sign a lease to live for a year in wicker park with my new friend Brynn. We are excited. Mostly, here's the apt: Open floor plan, two bedroom 1 bath (i have a really ass-small room with big closet, she has a huge room with small closet), jacuzzi tub in a huge bathroom, in unit washer dryer, gas fireplace, ginormous ceilings complete w/ chandeliers on the second floor of a two floor walkup. Oh yes, there's also a huge back porch. Oh yeah, accessible from only our porch (and kinda the one below) is a rooftop deck. Hammock sized. Oh yeah, and a garage space I negotiated in.  Did i say lots of attractive exposed brick. I first wrote that it was "pretty exposed brick" and you couldn't really tell how I meant to use the word "pretty". Well, streetrats, exposed brick is always pretty in nice apartments, so I meant it the way that means beautiful. 

And it's six blocks from our favorite part of the neighboorhood. And that six blocks is a walk through huge mansions and ultra expensive residentialness. Can you say a half mile from quimbys? I can. Then I can walk it. WHO-WA

Its new years at the new place because we move in the day after christmas. I want a bed for jesus day. Also our birthdays are sequential, so wed and thursday of late june, lookout. Free offstreet parking. and lots of it.

I should go look at things I can buy from target. If you have any other budgetable home-goods stores you look at until the time reads 5:14, please let me know so i can stall at work appropriately.

thank you.


Future Resident of 
1319 N. Oakley Blvd Apt 2
Chicago, IL 60622


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Thursday, November 1st, 2007
10:25 am
Some people post poems, some people post videos, and ralph posts things that only make my heart cry every second.
about the new job (highlights)
-Roughly, I play the character madonna plays on Will and Grace, when she's the office manager for an 80's music soundtrack company.  If Dan and Aratee come in late, I look at them, and they just KNOW. Except my company is a Crisis management PR firm and there is NO Pat Bennetar, no matter how much I ask.
-the above was the gayest dash-line I ever did write.
- apparently Im helping with a 1200 person christmas party. For a firm of like, 10. its all planned, but ig et rsvp detail. NO thank you.
- I signed a confidentiality agreement cause they deal with walmart. like a lot a lot.
-old roomate dan interns here as well, so its fun/not horribly eye gouging
-the president needs constant attention and mothering. Just found out that's my job, so... ok.
-I'm going to Arlington race track a lot? is that a highlight or just a nuissance? I'm not sure.

But most importantly, i'm jobbed up in the city with a tad bit of security.

also, I gmail chat all day long. CHAT WITH ME. ajkudla@gmail.com. Tre Fun.

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Wednesday, October 31st, 2007
1:38 pm
want to smash genitals?

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Wednesday, October 24th, 2007
9:08 pm
WHOOho im employed remove your top shirt!

Office Manager at what I think is a Crisis Management PR firm. I don't really know what the job is. Maybe Dan can post on here and give me some idea.

Also, my brother is making me read books about "being successful in corporate culture" which, ewpleaseidontwanna.

Questions I was asked (that I think they shouldn't have)
How old are you? Are you married? Do you have children? Who will win the election? Can I fingerbang you? How many siblings, what ages, and what are their occupations? Are you boys close?

Ok One of those wasn't asked. I'd have been honest if they did. 23. But hey. Live and learn.

It's a small firm, so I might get to do fun PR things. They kept asking me if I'd like to go to the Arlington races for media events. Horseraces? Media?!? Im hungry already!  Events!


I really should go. I've got nothing to add, really. Everybody cheats at scrabble on facebook, and I dont want it anymore.

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Saturday, October 20th, 2007
1:00 pm
I'd pay to see Albus Dumbledore and David Copperfield make love. Also make motorcycles fly. But that's a whole different show.

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Friday, October 19th, 2007
8:21 pm - Ever taken a "shame shower"?
Today I went on an interview for one of those "business to business / Door to Door" marketing groups. And I have to admit, audience, I knew what I was doing. I was woken up by one establishment cancelling my interview for tuesday (a marketing job I only half wanted, but it was legit), then I fell back asleep, only to be awoken by Green Light Marketing's phone call asking if I could come in today.

Checking on my resume profile, I remembered that Green Light was a company I applied to only because A) I could copy paste the resume from another position and B) It filled my "apply for 4 jobs a day" quota.

Since it was 11am, I needed a reason to leave the house and agreed to the interview.

In an office that ABSOFRACKINLUTELY doubled as a porn set, "Bald-headed-Sheaune" asked me lots of akward questions about my mother, then went into the most FAbulous tangent about how the West Wing and 24 represent disparate audiences. So does his company.

Fighting the urge to call Carole Kudla on the spot, I watched him keep his eyebrows in "that's very astute/im constipated" formation for 30 minutes, the whole while trying to get him to say "we're door to door sales". Here's how it went.

Sheaune (S): Any questions?
Me (M): What's your sales technique?
S: face to face. We deal with Business Customers.
M: So, you mean like, people?
S: Business related people, mostly business owners.
M: And do you do cold calls, or mostly "managed relationship" type contact lists
S: Well, ha ha, its cold in serbia
M. . . .(was I supposed to  laugh?)
S: What do you mean?
M: do you just walk into businesses for the first time and talk with them?
S:...Well, there is walking into business related work
M: As in, in and out there door?
S: Sometimes, you have to walk in and out of doors, yes. Can you start on Monday?
M: I think my career lies with other options.
S: What?
M: I appreciate the interview, but it really doesn't sound like my kind of work. Im not much for transient walking.
S: Sorry to waste your time
M: It was a slow day.

Then I went home and cleaned the condo. Now I'm going to re-read the HP series and go to bed. I have an interview tomorrow morning (wtf? a saturday? what?) and should be relatively alert.

night ya'll.

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Wednesday, October 17th, 2007
11:26 am - Hey
Got a crappy job that won't start for a few weeks. As long as my drug test, credit check, backgroud check, and reference check all go through.

Basically, I'm still searching cause one or more of those might not clear in my favor. Won't say which ones.

I've an an interview everyday for the past week, which is good for making me move everyday, but bad because I walk in suits for 2 miles a day and get very sweaty. Also good becuase I've gotten very good at saying what I want to "be when I grow up". What a condescending interview question, no?

They are filming a movie outside my apartment, so I'm going to spend the rest of my VERY free day pretending I go to Columbia and have a hip reason to loiter outside the Congress Hotel. One of the dressing rooms is labeled "concierge", so I might end up in there.

Turns out I keep wanting to spend my free days pretending I go to Columbia, either to crash an art show or be too cool for wearing straight leg jeans.

From Malaika02
1. Do you know anyone who has gotten an abortion?
    Yeah, but they don't know I know about the baby-killing.

2. Last awkward moment?
     Yesterday someone saw me accidentally spitting out the masking tape I ate.

3. Do you have any plans for tomorrow?
    I think Terri is coming to visit, but no.

4. Have you ever fallen backwards down a set of stairs?

5. Ever been to a friends house and starved the whole time?
     I'm always starving. It's like, my thing.

6. Ever found more than a dollar in a random place?
     If your wallet is a random place, then yes.

Alright. Gotta go kill my cat.

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Sunday, October 14th, 2007
2:18 am
Although I've been generally happy,

Tonight has been: me, a bottle of real cheap wine, a box of white cheddar cheezits, and facebook applications.


If only you can see how ugly it has gotten. I mean, I almost laid "cunt" in scrabble against anna cosner's mom for 24 points 24!

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Saturday, October 13th, 2007
1:33 am - Im back
So in the past two weeks, I moved out of Normal, into chicago with my brother, ran around submitting applications. Day two of chicago I flew to AZ for a week, drove 3 hours and back to Yuma for more family, flew to chicago, then started interviewing the next day. slept in 4 beds/places. Dont wanna mantion them all. trust. Went well, had the follow up right away, in between the interviewers and HR meetings (about the interviews) so that was kind of wierd. Final one on Monday with Manager. The position was too small for manager interview, so i think somethin shady is goin on, like im gettin interviewed for a different position.

Its in hotel, but whatver. I need a job to cover the next few months work to get a salary job. I've said this was more or less the plan, just kinda surprised that A) im following through and B) its moving so quickly. I walk everywhere (which is kinda cool, cause, you know, turn a corner and theres the sears tower), but my feet are in lots of pain every night.

Also I've gotten to explore the city a whole bunch. I heart wicker park. Also there was a pimpmobile showcase on the way to the fried fish place. So I was kinda diggin the day.

Tomorrow i get to go to 4 suburbs to move a binch of my fmailies shit around.

Not a good entry, I know. Im just very tired. See you all later.

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Monday, October 1st, 2007
2:44 pm - darnit
So a few minutes ago I thought I had been spelling Wednesday wrong my whole life, and that for some thefacebookdotcom was the one to break the news.

I hadn't been spelling it wrong at all, but this was a serious issue for a few minutes until I googled days of the week. Easier said that done, I ended up learning more about the Norse god Woden that I had planned. And i never call wednesday "the peak of the week".

Here is a list of things that are happening.

1-I got very sick last night
2-Im supposed move to chicago in 3 hours
3-packing is not going very well. Although Ive been confined to a small bedroom for the last 4 months, ive displaced many a small item like books and a cat.
4-on the aforementioned day of the week, the day after i move, im supposed to fly to phoenix for a week of family then fly back
5- i quit my job, so...i dont have one...not what i enjoy....
6- i will owe a lot of money before i will be owed a lot.
7- i am making poor choices
8-i spent more money in one day leaving this town than I ever have living here. Including rent days.
9- number 8 is leaving a bad taste in my mouth. So is the food i vomited up last night.
10- i didn't break my computer through porn...so I guess thats a good thing.

all in all...Its a pretty terrible day.

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Wednesday, September 19th, 2007
1:50 am - trapped in normal
Hey, Dan, I don't like chelsea Handler's new version of the show.
But congratulations on the Emmy.


for the past 5 years, time in bloomington goes by pretty quickly. But did you ever notice when you REALLY need the time to go quicker, it just kind of sputters. So since I put my two weeks in, its been. um. not so fast.

Lets extend a metaphor-

I feel like I just got married, so i should be happy and excited and ready for change, but then we get in the car to drive to the honeymoon, and those cans on a string people put on the back of your car gets hooked onto the dog I grew up with, but we didn't notice, so we dragged the puppy across the gravel until its face and body were shaved off. Now its just this long red bloody trail called "tranquil memories" smeared along the onramp. and THAT moment when we see the blood in the rearview mirror? This two weeks has been feeling like that moment is just locked in.

alright, I've got to get back to bed so i can library for jobs tomorrow morning.

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Friday, September 14th, 2007
2:55 am
Heh. Oh yeah, by the way... I put in my two weeks notice and I'll be living in the loop. By next week. Whoa.

i don't have things like friends or a job or friends downtown. But i have fancy blue eyes and thighs like a rhino, so i suppose that's money in the bank SOMEHOW.

Um, State and Roosevelt.

Let me just take this time to thank my brother, Matt. I really should get him something good, like a snowglobe or firstborn.  I mean, hes kinda charging me pretty much nothing to live in the center of the U.S. He said it makes up for all the crap beatings he gave me as kids. i agreed. I mean, he gave me his car for 3 moths, a bunch of tuition money, and now a room in chicago, but will that REALLY make up for my permanent twitch reflex whenever someone makes a fast move? I suppose it might...

Wow. I think I'm going to be happy for the first time in months. and i might have a job at the palmer.

my thighs can be metaphored to many African animals, like slow cheetahs and Tall alligators, too.
and at the Field museum, you can make wax copies for $1.51

i love you all, fuckers.

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Sunday, September 9th, 2007
6:56 pm - ouch
I either have a pinched nerve or a kidney stone.
the funny thing is, after all my paranoid online research, I never thought to let you all know.

So i want it to be a pinched nerve, cause, you know, thats not organ pain. organ pain terrifies me deeply, anywho, every hour or so i get this flashingly violent bout of hurt in one central place left side mid back. for about 1-4 seconds, and then its gone.   i feel like i have a stone but it hasnt actually gone in the tube to travel yet (the painful part). and if this is the case, i hate life.

also, id have to go to the hospital, and i dont like hospitals.

Please, for the sake of my mind, tell me about your pinched nerve/kidney stone experiences. List other symptoms. You can leave out blinding pain that brings you to your knees. Its sort of a given at this point. except if it hit in a funny moment, like standing at the altar as a bridesmaid or climbing the rope in gym.

and finally, ive seen all office season 1,2 and starting on 3. 


my co workers are calling them kudlastones. not.funny.

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Thursday, August 30th, 2007
1:14 am

I drove 6 hours to Omaha, NE. I had some fun for a few days, then i drove back.

I'm now watching "The Jerk" for the first time in life. Gee golly i want nothing more than  a twinkie.

i left NE at 530AM, got in IL around 1PM, worked from 3PM to 11PM. then when I came home, one of my roomates MAY have pulled a hunting knife on me. He didnt mean to, he just thought i might be a murderer/rapist. But i could TOTALLY never rape anyone. murder...yes. Rape...no. and the funny thing is, I kept asking him WHY he was hiding the knife, and he kept saying "just in case".

gosh i live in some strange grey area.

I'm looking for places to live in Chicago. its not going so well. especially since i don't have a job.

I could really use some fun " got a BA in English and got a job in 1 month" comments.

and those comments must contain suitable living conditions.

I am fucked then..... right?

ttyl, horsefaces.

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Monday, August 20th, 2007
3:05 am
Drivin to NE on Sunday. want to play?

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